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[Father Christmas]
In comes I oh Father Christmas
Am I welcome or am I not?
I hope old Father Christmas and I
Shall never be forgot.
Room, Room, Lady and Gentleman,
Room, Room, I say
For I am the Noble Captain
Brought all my men this way.[Twin Twain]
In comes I little Twin Twain
the noble man of all this Press Gang.
I press them all and sent them all aboard of man o'war.
Although I am but little and small
I call myself the best man among them all.[Father Bellzie Bub]
In come I old Father Bellzie Bub,
Over my shoulder I carry my club.
My head is made of a dripping pan,
And don't you think I am a handsome young man
Room, Room, Lady and Gentleman,
Room, Room, I say.
Step in King George and clear the way.[King George]
In comes I King George
That man of courage bold,
With my sword and spear
I won three hundred ton in gold,
It was I who killed the dragon
And sent him to a slaughter,
And by those means I won
The queen of Denmark Daughter.
Oh oh that man that come under my hand
I cut him as small as dust
and send his Body to the Bakehouse to make a pie-crust.[Turkish Knight]
In comes the proud Turkish Knight
just come from my proud Turkish land to fight
that man of courage bold.
If his blood is hot, I soon draw it cold.[King George?]
Draw out your sword and fight
Pull out your purse and pay
For satisfaction we will have
This very night before we go away.[Turkish Knight?]
Oh you villain, let us this battle try:
Lady and Gentleman see what wonderful work I done,
I cut and slain the Champion down like a flying eagle in the sun.[Bold and Hardy]
In come I the valiant soldier,
Bold and Hardy is my name,
To be of vengie of my master
Death unto this place I came.
My head is as hard as iron
My hamlet is made of steel
My sword is buckle by my side
To fight King George all in this field.[King George?]
Oh Hardy, Hardy, don't you be so bold
nor talk or think so great;
when you see your master lay there dead and cold
soon you shall be in the same state.[Bold and Hardy]
Oh you villain it was you who struck my master
with a blow pierce him to the heart
the very same thing I will do to you this night
before we two do part.
Let us this battle try.
Now Lady and Gentleman see what wonderful work I have done.[King George?]
Oh you villain, as you live
this very night long side that rough Turkey you shall lie.[King George?]
Lady and Gentleman see what wonderful work I have done:
I have cut and lain these two champions down,
like a flying eagle in the sun.[Unidentified Interrogator]
Doctor, Doctor!
is there a doctor to be had all in this night
to cure these two men of their bleeding wound
and make them stand up right?
oh yes there is a doctor to be had all in this night
to cure these two men of their bleeding wound
and make them stand up right.
What can you cure, Doctor?[Doctor]
Hippsey, Pippsy Pousey Gout
Pain wound inside or out
broken arm broken leg broken bone of any kind.[Unidentified Interrogator]
What you fees, Doctor?
[Doctor]
Twenty guineas is my fees, money I have down;
Although you are an honest man I do it for ten pound.[Unidentified Interrogator]
When will you see me pay?
I see you pay or unpay in the morning,
you see me pay or unpay in the morning.[Doctor]
You see me pay or unpay in the morning:
here, boy, get my horse and I am gone.[Unidentified Interrogator]
Stop, stop, Doctor; I see you pay in the morning.
[Doctor]
Oh now you talk more like a man.
Now, Lady and Gentleman, I have got a little box of pills
which I called the best Dutch pills,
likewise a bottle of drops which I called the best golden drops.
I shall put one to the nose and one to the heart,
and make them rise and fight their part.
Snuff hard, Jack ![Unidentified Patient]
Rise, fight, fall no more, for many time have I been slay:
I'll rise and fight King George again.[Unidentified Interrogator]
Doctor, kick these two Turkish dogs out of doors.
Little Black Jack
In come I little Black Jack,
wife and family at my back:
money I have, money I crave;
if you don't give me money I will sweep you to your grave.
Although Christmas comes but once a year,
when it comes it brings good cheer.
Plum-pudding mincepies,
nobody likes them better than I.
Money in pocket is a very fine thing
though it isn't very often to be seen.
Lady and Gentleman, give me what you please.[Unidentified Speaker]
Now Doctor, these two Turkish dogs that you just kick out of doors
if they will their master pardon beg,
I will them forgive.
Pardon me most noble king and do not cut me down;
I will be burnt unto stake if you will heal up my crown.
Rise and sing and see your county knighted,
for to-night will merry merry be
and to-morrow we get sober.
Notes
Scanned text downloaded from http://members.tripod.co.uk/Sandmartyn/mum16.htm